Watched this amazing video and started thinking.
More often than not my days are hard. I truly never thought my life would turn out this way, and it's so easy to take that and turn it into something negative. Suddenly I find myself shrinking into the floor thinking of everything that I'm not, everything that I wish my son could get from his mother. It's so easy to get yourself down wishing you were so much better than you are. I wish I wasn't so easily frustrated. I struggle with the fact that I could have gone to university, that I could have moved away and lived somewhere else. Sometimes I imagine my life and Eli's life if we hadn't stayed together, if I had made different choices what would my life be? What would his life be? Would he be happier, more loved? Tears well up in my eyes as I worry that I am not enough for this beautiful little boy. But then he crawls over to my legs, tugs on my legs, and asks to be picked up. He gives me a big slobbery kiss on the lips and everything washes away. I remember that I am everything to this little guy. It's me he cries for during the night when he wakes up alone. It's me who's name he yells out as we stroll down our streets. It's me. Pretty amazing, right? You mamas know what I'm talking about.